What To Do For Social Anxiety Disorder

How to Overcome a Social Phobia

from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit

Some people can have serious problems trying to communicate with other peers that are associated with feelings of anxiety or fear. Although this article may not cure your social phobia, it can help you take steps to become better at day to day interactions.

Steps

1. Analyze the reasons for your fear. Knowing what is causing social phobia can help you overcome it. Sometimes you may feel as though there is no rhyme or reason to your phobia, but try to find the root of your fear.
   
2. Realize that not everyone is judging you. Often times social phobia can be a result of thinking that everyone around you is passing judgment on you. If so, take a step back, and realize that most people don't care.
   
3. Start out small. Make small talk with people you see often, employees, schoolmates, or other people that you come in contact with.
   
4. Do something crazy in public. This can help you overcome the "embarrassment factor," which can contribute a lot to social phobia. Levels of craziness may vary; one person may feel uncomfortable wearing a mini skirt while another will only feel uncomfortable when they are wearing a Martian suit. Although you may feel awkward when you do something crazy, after wards you may find that you feel a sense of accomplishment or pride.
   
5. Find a club, team, or a group that relates to one of your interests and skills. You will have fun and meet new people due to the small and intimate environment. This makes it easier to force yourself to talk, you can't just get lost in the crowd.
   
6. Use self motivation. This can help you to push yourself and reach your goal of overcoming social phobia.
   
7. The first thing that you have to do before any other is to realize an important fact. People want to be talked to. Communication is the most common voluntary activity in any culture, ever. So relax.
   
8. Know that socializing is 80% mental, and 20% practice. If you are too concerned with what others think about you, then it makes talking to them nearly impossible. Lighten up a little, start with some small talk. Give them a compliment or two. People love compliments. It’s a fact.
   
9. Don't be obsessive or talk about things that your co-converser really doesn't seem interested in. Despite what you think, it’s not that hard to tell. If you know anything about your target, you should know what he or she is or isn't into.
   
10. For large groups, just hang back and relax. There are a bunch of people contributing into the conversation, so don't feel like you're pressured to say something. The key is acting like you're comfortable. When you get a chance to contribute something meaningful that you think the others will appreciate, throw it in there. You'll do just fine.
    
11. If you slip up and say something stupid, don't worry about it. Everyone does it, even the popular kids. Try listening to what they say with a critical ear and you'll hear that they make mistakes just as much as anyone else. It's just really obvious when you get caught up on it and obsess over whether it was the right thing to say or not.
    
12. Remember that the majority of people are not interested in your flaws. Most people make an effort to pay attention to the good things people do and say, so express your good qualities and ignore your bad ones. Chances are others will too. Those who pick at your flaws usually do so because of a lack of self-esteem on their part; just remember that them being negative towards you is a huge flaw in their personality.
    
13. Don't fall into the trap of thinking you must fake confidence. people will see right through it and you will end up looking like a douche bag. Instead, know your positive qualities and be proud of them. Remember that EVERYONE has something to be confident about, even you. Notice that some of the 'cool kids' don't even have a large amount of good qualities yet they still have high self esteem; they can just be confident about their confidence, which is a good quality in itself. Anyone can choose to attain it.
    
14. If you feel like there's nothing you can contribute socially, just try being kind and see where it gets you. People like to be around people who make them happy, and kindness is a really easy way to make others happy. Give genuine compliments, make eye contact, show interest, and SMILE. Whatever you can do to brighten someone's day is a point in your favor.
    
15. Stop worrying about you. Nobody cares if you feel like you're being judged or treated unfairly. Instead, worry about making the people around you feel more comfortable in any way you can. Even if you're not good at it, just having the intention makes a huge difference. Eventually (sooner than you think) you'll get really good at making others comfortable and happy, and lots of people will want to be around you.
    
16. There is nobody stopping you from getting over social phobia. It most certainly isn't permanent. You just need to take your time and accomplish things step by step, because it isn't something that can be changed overnight.
    

Tips

• Do things one step at a time.
  
• Consult a therapist if you have extreme social phobia.
  
• Be comfortable. They're just people, and there are over 6 billion of them in the world. They won’t eat you.
  
• Be yourself.
  
• Be positive.
  
• Find people who are right for you. Chose those who make you happiest over those who look popular and cool; you'll find out how fake the latter tend to be soon enough.
  
• Remember that you aren't different from anyone else who has overcome social phobia. We all felt like we were the only ones with our problem until we got over it.
  
• If the most "popular" people don't like you, don't worry about it. Popularity is not everything.
  

Warnings

• Don't get discouraged. Have perseverance and patience, because in the end the results will be worth all the work and courage you had to muster up for it.
  
• Don't avoid things. Every time you avoid an event, person, or a situation - you let your Social Anxiety win. You will be proud of yourself later and feel much more confident in social situations.
  
• Don't get all stressed out if some people don't like you. Everybody has people that don't like them, even the popular kids. It's those who know what others think about them but continue to be themselves that stand out.
  

Related wikiHows

• How to Overcome Claustrophobia
  
• How to Overcome Ablutophobia
  
• How to Overcome Ambulophobia
  
• How to Overcome Ophthalmophobia
  
• How to Overcome Phobia
  

Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Overcome a Social Phobia. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.

How To Stop Blushing

How to Avoid Blushing at Inappropriate Times

from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit

Blushing, it happens to everyone. But what do you do when it happens more than normal? This article is going to explain some simple tricks to avoid blushing and fight the fear of getting red in the face.

Steps

1. Remember that blushing is completely normal. It is usually caused by a number of factors which are mostly caused as a result of a person’s mentality. An awkward moment, a mistake, or even an odd thought can trigger people to blush. It is quite difficult to control a blush once it begins and essentially it is unhealthy to want to anyway. We are all human. However there are things a person can do before in order to minimize blushing and control any social situation when blushing occurs.
   
2. Relax. Tension allows blushing to increase. The second you feel yourself begin to blush immediately relax all your muscles. You can’t be entirely in control once you begin to get red, but you can prevent your face from becoming a cherry tomato! Practice by trying to blush in front of a mirror and relaxing your shoulders. This will help you see how you will handle the situation on real life.
   
3. Accept it. If you are talking to someone and it happens, just say it and move on. If you tell the person and get on to the next subject, chances are it won’t be as troublesome. Make it short and move on. People will see that you are comfortable despite the fact that you are blushing and they won’t tease you.
   
4. Avoid feeling embarrassed. The more a person hides his or her blushing and is conscious of it, the more it will probably occur. When you are talking, dancing, or whatever it may be, just go with the flow. Say to yourself “Well, I’m blushing right now. No big deal.” Self-acceptance goes a long way. Say to yourself words of encouragement like “this is no big deal”, “I am amazing”. the words you say in your mind will become true.
   
5. Prevention. If you blush often or during a particular activity (public speaking anyone?) do these visualizing activities before you go to bed. Imagine all the situations where you blush. Imagine how other people think of you; imagine they see the thing that is making you embarrassed. Think about why it makes you embarrassed. How embarrassing is it? The more you do this activity, the more you will be comfortable with yourself and eventually around others.
   
6. Turn blushing into a game. Try to see how red you can make yourself. More often than not, this will actually reduce how red you will become.
   
7. Wash your face and apply a thin film of oil-free moisturizer (if not the makeup will dry out your skin.) This also keeps your face cool which is good if the blushing burns.
   

Tips

• If worse comes to worst, go to the nearest bathroom or kitchen and put a damp cloth on your face... an air conditioner will also do the trick.
  
• Do as many social things as possible. The more comfortable you are around people, the less you will blush. Guaranteed. Interacting with humans makes life more special and will simply make you a better and more interesting person.
  
• Get a tan as to reduce the clarity of the blush.
  
• If you blush every time you are even in the same room as your crush, or talking to them especially, you probably get as red as Santa's pants. That type of blushing can be so intense it is unavoidable. The only thing you can do in this situation is wear make-up, works like a charm.
  
• Try casually covering your cheek with your hand if you feel a blush coming on and can't prevent it.
  
• Also realize that people really don't tend to notice.
  

Warnings

• Don't quit. If you blush and begin to get nervous then you are quitting. Life is about taking risks. You will miss out on many things if you allow this to control how you interact with others.
  
• Don't be too hard on yourself, getting rid of habits isn't easy.
  
• Do NOT attempt to hide the blushing with makeup. This never works and usually the tendency is to go overboard to make sure you're covered which looks terrible. If you're a chronic blusher, people will know what you're attempting to do.
  

Related wikiHows

• How to Apply Blush
  
• How to Be an Attractive Woman
  

Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Avoid Blushing at Inappropriate Times. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.

How To Prevent Blushing

How to Stop Feeling Self Conscious

from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit

Why do you feel self conscious? Is it the way you look or the way you think you look? Who is judging you and why do you care about their opinions?

Steps

1. Identify what you're terribly conscious about. A certain aspect of your appearance? The twitch in your eye? Your accent? Your Disability? Your intellectual abilities? Make a list of these things and next to each item, write something you can do to improve it.
   
2. Figure out who you're trying to please and why. What kind of expectations are making you so self conscious? Is everyone around you picture perfect, or are you comparing yourself to airbrushed models in magazines? Have you convinced yourself that no one else has twitches, or flaws, or trips? Stop for a second and turn that self-criticism outwards. No one is perfect, and you've never noticed their little quirks before, so why would they pay so much attention to yours? Just feel like there's no need to worry and always picture yourself like you know you look and feel good in front of others, but don't think about it too much because it will already be embedded.
   
3. Redirect your attention. When you start to feel self conscious, locate a target - it doesn't matter what it is, it may be the bug crawling across the floor - and concentrate on it. What color is it? How many legs? Anything that turns the attention away from yourself will do the trick.
   
4. Make fun of yourself. Yep, that's right--not in a self-depreciating sort of way, but in a humble and witty way to acknowledge that you're not perfect and you don't care. After you drop a jar of peanut butter in front of someone you fancy and watch in horror as it shatters into pieces and splatters peanut butter chunks on the floor, burst out laughing at your inherent clumsiness, cracking a joke that you should be required to wear double-sided tape on your hands--and then apologize and help clean it up!
   
5. Build your self confidence. Make an effort to gain a deeper understanding of your self-worth. Replace your worries about what other people think about you with a preoccupation over your own goals, achievements, and progress.
   
6. Work on changing the inner you. You have to believe that you are special and that no one is better or more important than you.
   
7. Just let it be. Don't care about it too much, if you feel self-conscious. It will be OK.
   

Tips

• Take a deep breath. Break that focus you're locked into where all you can imagine is yourself.
  
• Change your self talk from negative to positive. Say "I am a very confident person". Repeat this as often as you can, any time of the day. Find other affirmations that will help boost the way you feel about yourself.
  
• Look in the mirror each day and say "I love you" out loud to yourself.
  
• As you read this, don't tell yourself it's stupid. Just don't think someone is better than you. You have so much to contribute, and whether you do or not marks what kind of a person you are.
  
• Being fake is ugly. Just don't do it.
  
• When someone criticizes you, take it and don't be mean back. That's what they want.
  
• Remember, "Always be the first rate version of yourself, instead of a second rate version of someone else," Judy Garland.
  
• Don't worry about what people think- they're not interested in you as much as you'd think because they are probably worrying about themselves more.
  

Warnings

• Sometimes people may try to bully you if they sense you are vulnerable - they are bullies - walk away, and never waste time trying to impress them.
  
• Have faith in your own ability, and when you meet someone, ask lots of questions about them.
  
• Don't always be on the defensive. Be willing to admit when you have done something wrong because it really isn't the end of the world. Everyone makes mistakes. Go ahead and apologize. Then MOVE ON.
  
• Stop looking for the approval of others. Its a trap and a snare.
  

Related wikiHows

• How to Build Self Confidence
  
• How to Be Yourself
  
• How to Accept Being Shy
  
• How to Avoid Blushing at Inappropriate Times
  

Sources and Citations

• http://www.positive-personal-growth.com/build-confidence.html
  

Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Stop Feeling Self Conscious. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.

How to Stop Feeling Self Conscious

from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit

Why do you feel self conscious? Is it the way you look or the way you think you look? Who is judging you and why do you care about their opinions?

Steps

1. Identify what you're terribly conscious about. A certain aspect of your appearance? The twitch in your eye? Your accent? Your Disability? Your intellectual abilities? Make a list of these things and next to each item, write something you can do to improve it.
   
2. Figure out who you're trying to please and why. What kind of expectations are making you so self conscious? Is everyone around you picture perfect, or are you comparing yourself to airbrushed models in magazines? Have you convinced yourself that no one else has twitches, or flaws, or trips? Stop for a second and turn that self-criticism outwards. No one is perfect, and you've never noticed their little quirks before, so why would they pay so much attention to yours? Just feel like there's no need to worry and always picture yourself like you know you look and feel good in front of others, but don't think about it too much because it will already be embedded.
   
3. Redirect your attention. When you start to feel self conscious, locate a target - it doesn't matter what it is, it may be the bug crawling across the floor - and concentrate on it. What color is it? How many legs? Anything that turns the attention away from yourself will do the trick.
   
4. Make fun of yourself. Yep, that's right--not in a self-depreciating sort of way, but in a humble and witty way to acknowledge that you're not perfect and you don't care. After you drop a jar of peanut butter in front of someone you fancy and watch in horror as it shatters into pieces and splatters peanut butter chunks on the floor, burst out laughing at your inherent clumsiness, cracking a joke that you should be required to wear double-sided tape on your hands--and then apologize and help clean it up!
   
5. Build your self confidence. Make an effort to gain a deeper understanding of your self-worth. Replace your worries about what other people think about you with a preoccupation over your own goals, achievements, and progress.
   
6. Work on changing the inner you. You have to believe that you are special and that no one is better or more important than you.
   
7. Just let it be. Don't care about it too much, if you feel self-conscious. It will be OK.
   

Tips

• Take a deep breath. Break that focus you're locked into where all you can imagine is yourself.
  
• Change your self talk from negative to positive. Say "I am a very confident person". Repeat this as often as you can, any time of the day. Find other affirmations that will help boost the way you feel about yourself.
  
• Look in the mirror each day and say "I love you" out loud to yourself.
  
• As you read this, don't tell yourself it's stupid. Just don't think someone is better than you. You have so much to contribute, and whether you do or not marks what kind of a person you are.
  
• Being fake is ugly. Just don't do it.
  
• When someone criticizes you, take it and don't be mean back. That's what they want.
  
• Remember, "Always be the first rate version of yourself, instead of a second rate version of someone else," Judy Garland.
  
• Don't worry about what people think- they're not interested in you as much as you'd think because they are probably worrying about themselves more.
  

Warnings

• Sometimes people may try to bully you if they sense you are vulnerable - they are bullies - walk away, and never waste time trying to impress them.
  
• Have faith in your own ability, and when you meet someone, ask lots of questions about them.
  
• Don't always be on the defensive. Be willing to admit when you have done something wrong because it really isn't the end of the world. Everyone makes mistakes. Go ahead and apologize. Then MOVE ON.
  
• Stop looking for the approval of others. Its a trap and a snare.
  

Related wikiHows

• How to Build Self Confidence
  
• How to Be Yourself
  
• How to Accept Being Shy
  
• How to Avoid Blushing at Inappropriate Times
  

Sources and Citations

• http://www.positive-personal-growth.com/build-confidence.html
  

Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Stop Feeling Self Conscious. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.

How to Avoid Blushing

from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit

It seems like there's no escaping that embarrassing flush of the cheeks every time you look at your crush, hear an off-color joke, or make a mistake. However, there are ways to prevent and help such occurences. Read the steps below to keep yourself from going red in the face!

Steps

1. Try to prevent blushing in the first place. Find out when you blush. Is it when you're angry, or when you're nervous? Is it when you look at or think of a certain someone? Is it when you're put in the spotlight? Don't necessarily try to avoid whatever makes you blush, but realize that there is no reason to blush when it comes along.
   
2. Snap out of it. When you do blush, you can quickly fade it out by relaxing your muscles (particularly in your shoulders and neck) and thinking of something else. A smile is also a great way to fade a blush, and it will look more natural as our cheeks naturally redden when we smile.
   
3. Stop caring. Most people either find blushing to be cute or don't notice it at all. And if you stop caring about your random red times, you'll have less of them. Basically, being less tense creates less signs of tension. If you learn to be more relaxed and care less what people think of your blushing, you won't worry about it anyway, and so there will be much less reason to blush. Besides, it's probably much less noticeable than you think!
   
4. Don't try to hide it! It will just make it much worse. And make you blush more often. Just embrace it. Once you stop trying to cover it up, you'll stop caring and that will really help with NOT blushing.
   
5. Imagine jumping in an ice-cold lake. It'll help you cool down and relax you a bit.
   

Tips

• Breathe deeply. It helps prevent and disperse blushing.
  
• You can practice fading blushes in the mirror, if you can get yourself to blush.
  
• Blushing shouldn't be too much of a problem provided you keep a serious face if you're angry or a big smile any other time.
  
• Commenting on your blushing is an easy way to stop caring about it.
  
• Get an older friend of the opposite sex to say things that make you blush until you can deal.
  
• If all else fails, forget everything else and remember some people think blushing is cute. Even the most masculine men go weak at the knees when they see a girl blush. It's an asset, not a flaw!
  
• Try to make yourself blush--it's impossible to force a blush and you actually stop blushing!
  

Warnings

• Trying to hide your blushing too much will only make it worse.
  
• Don't be too calm, you don't want to fade out and ignore everything.
  

Related wikiHows

• How to Get Over an Embarassing Moment
  

Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Avoid Blushing. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.